Jesus couldn’t go to Principia College

If Jesus was alive today he would not be able to attend Principia College. For starters, Jesus wasn’t a Christian Scientist (he’s Jewish), and Jesus did a fair bit of drinking in his day.

Not being a Christian Scientist would be the biggest hurdle. Principia is a community made up exclusively of Christian Scientists. As About Principia College explains:

Principia students, faculty, and staff come from many different countries and an even greater variety of backgrounds, but they share one thing in common: Christian Science. The College is not affiliated with the Christian Science Church, and Christian Science is not taught as a subject, but its principles form the basis of community life at Principia. Faculty and students alike strive to see themselves and each other as unlimited expressions of God. As a result, expectations are high, but so is the support community members provide each other.         (emphasis mine)

Principia’s Purpose & Policies clearly spell out who can and can’t attend:

As a rule, members of the student body shall be accepted only from homes in which at least one of the parents or the guardian can give evidence of being a sincere Christian Scientist and of being ready to depend upon Christian Science for help in time of need.    (emphasis mine)

Sorry Jesus, your parents, Mary and Joseph? Not practicing Christian Scientists.

So no, Jesus couldn’t attend Prin. If by some chance he converted to Christian Science then there would be other issues, like his drinking habits. In Luke he drinks with tax collectors and sinners:

But the Pharisees and the teachers of the law who belonged to their sect complained to his disciples, “Why do you eat and drink with tax collectors and ‘sinners’?” NIV Luke 5:30

The Son of Man came eating and drinking, and you say, ‘Here is a glutton and a drunkard, a friend of tax collectors and “sinners.”‘ NIV Luke 7:34

In Matthew 26:27 he actively encourages others to drink as well:

Then he took the cup, gave thanks and offered it to them, saying, “Drink from it, all of you. NIV Matthew 26:27

He encourages them again in Mark:

Then he took the cup, gave thanks and offered it to them, and they all drank from it. NIV Mark 14:23

In John 2:1-11 Jesus goes so far as to turn water into wine for a party – and it’s good wine.

While it is unlikely Jesus drank to excess, any consumption of alcohol is a blatant violation of the Principia Pledge & Community Commitment:

All members of the Principia community are expected to live in accord with the stated Pledge and Principia Community Commitment. To the best of your knowledge, is the applicant free from participation in and/or use of the following? Alcohol, tobacco, marijuana, and other drugs (including drugs for medicinal purposes); lying, cheating, stealing and vandalism; premarital or extramarital sexual relations (both heterosexual and homosexual).

Although the college news paper occasionally talks about the drug and alcohol problems on campus the reality of the situation was that such problems were either glossed over or people who were already disliked were sent home.

Sorry Jesus, but with your already non-existent/shaky CS credentials a little drinking is getting you on the first Alton Limo back to STL.

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5 thoughts on “Jesus couldn’t go to Principia College

  1. Catherine C. says:

    wow i had no idea that one of your parents had to be CS too! so independent thinking isn’t allowed? what if your parents were like, catholic or something and you were like “i must be CS it is totally for me and i wanna go to prin” um sorry you’re not good enough? ugh prin…

    • kindism says:

      Well, technically you can get in if your parents aren’t CS, but you need someone of good CS standing to “vouch” for you and I’d imagine it is a bit harder.

  2. BCD says:

    Your clever point about Jesus not meeting Principia’s admission criteria is wonderful but hypothetical. Not hypothetical is the fact that many highly qualified, moral, and deserving young people are unwelcome to apply simply because they are not Christian Scientists–even if their Prin roots run deep.

    My family has had a connection to Principia for more than 50 years. I have a brother and a niece who went to the Upper School, another brother who attended the College, and myself, graduating from there. My parents and I were substantial donors to Prin. I got an excellent education there and have many good memories of my undergraduate experience.

    Notwithstanding this long-term association with Principia, my own daughter would not be welcome to apply. I left Christian Science many years ago, and we raised her in a different religious faith. But the truth is, I would have loved for her to have been able to attend Prin if it had been open to students from other faiths. I believe that exposure to peers from other religious traditions would be a good thing for Principia students and better prepare them to integrate successfully into the world outside the gate.

    Anyway, my daughter attended a college similar to Principia in many ways: a small university in the rural midwest with a connection to a religious tradition. Like Prin, the academics were solid and the teaching supportive, and it required students to adhere to a strict code of conduct. I am pleased to say that she had a positive experience, earning a bachelor of science degree with honors in two majors. I am so proud of her. She would have been a credit to any institution, so it is Prin’s loss, really.

    And Principia keeps sending me requests to donate. Why should I resume donating when my children and grandchildren will be excluded?

    Do you think it just might be possible that Principia will change its policy some day so that good, moral, motivated students from other faiths will be welcome? What are they afraid of?

    • elle says:

      “Anyway, my daughter attended a college similar to Principia in many ways: a small university in the rural midwest with a connection to a religious tradition. Like Prin, the academics were solid…”

      …and that’s where it no longer overlaps with Prin. The academics have been shaky for a while now, sadly.

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